You can get lost in this world of space here, there’s so much I have to say but don’t know where to start. I don’t particularly care if no one reads it, but it will make me feel better, knowing I’ve written it all down with my two finger typing speed! I’m just learning how the bloody computer works, let alone trying to set up a blog (which I hope people will find amusing) and yet after reading some one else’s blog avidly I decided I could do this. I know this is all random to you but I’ve got to start somewhere so bear with me.

Being pregnant at 38 is one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. To start a new life is so much responsibility, and believe me I’m not a very responsible person, but I have raised one daughter into a beautiful person so things can’t be all bad! When I found out I was pregnant I wasn’t sure what to do… I mean I had my life back. Katie was 13 and independent almost and her dad was dying of cancer. Could I really say to her” look, Mum’s having another baby.” I didn’t want to upset her anymore then I had to. Also, she’d had me for 13 years all to her self.

But hey ho, after a lot of soul searching I finally introduced her to Nathan, my wonderful partner whom I’m sure will soon be Katie’s Step-dad (not that any one could replace the wonderful man she had as a dad.) And Nathan and I decided that we had created this life and would go ahead with this pregnancy. The fact that we had just lost one beautiful person; it seemed all the more important. I hadn’t been with Nathan for very long so it was a big decision.

But as the months have gone by I’ve come to realise that it was the best thing I’ve ever done - apart from the fact I cant see my feet, shave my bits or paint my toe nails. I asked Katie to do it and she said: “Mum, Nath got you into this…he will have to do it! so bless him, he offered. After all…I’m about to lose all my dignity in January when I give birth, and he isn’t doing that for me, is he?

Birthing plans: hospital, pain relief and drugs please. I’m all for these natural births but this is going to hurt!! Nathan and Katie are going to be there, even though I didn’t particularly want them at the end of the bed – I mean its not particularly dignified is it? Anyway Katie has been to all the scans and I have explained that birth is very messy, so in her wisdom a couple of months ago she sat down and told me that she may not be there after all. I asked why, and she gave me the reason. Do you know what she said? Apparently she didn’t want to die a virgin!!!!!! I suppose she had a point but out of the mouths of babes? Any way, after much to-ing and fro-ing she is coming now, much to my Mum’s disgust who I am sure would rather sit in the waiting room smoking a cigar!!!

Don't kick the dog.

Let me explain a little about myself. I know nothing about computers. I have been told by my friend who blogs to create one - I suppose she thinks I couldn't do it. But hey ho, I think I've actually gone and done it!

Well anyway I'm a lot fat as I'm 8 months pregnant and I have a daughter who is 13. She is my be all and end all. She has just lost her dad to cancer. It's a strange thing when asked by your ex that when he is near the end, will you nurse him... but that's just what I did. And that's how I met my blog friend! Of course I know her as another name...I'll let you guess who she is.

God! I feel like a large wheelie bin on legs. I'm 38 years old and pregnant!!! What happened? you may ask. With a 13 year old daughter I thought I'd left that all behind, but I met a man and fell in love. Ummm...it's not quite what it seems. He's lovely but he is the laziest bloke I've ever met! I told him yesterday I was going to make him a star chart for good behaviour. You think I'm joking? I'm not! Well today he lost any stars he got yesterday. Being 8 months preggers its hard to see my feet let alone any thing else. I suppose lots of things look trivial but when he said "is that what your'e wearing?" I nearly flipped! Yeah, ok...I expect Kate MOSS wouldn't wear my knickers (and I wouldn't let her have mine any way cause she can afford her own) but he apparently doesn't like my g strings!!! That means I've been wearing a cheese wire which almost cut me in half cause I thought he liked them, but he doesn't. Bastard. I could have been wearing big comfy nicks all through this pregnancy!!!

YOU KNOW YOU'RE FROM DEVON WHEN...

♥ You've bought stationery at Trago Mills.

♥ You think Exeter's a big city.

♥ You can tell sheep from goats and straw from hay*

♥ You once went to Totnes for the day and returned three weeks later, very happy, but with no idea why.

♥ You think London's 'up north'.

♥ You know someone who knows someone who knows someone who knows Joss Stone.

♥ The smell of cow shit makes you feel at home.

♥ Everywhere else in the UK feels cold.

♥ You have a friend who lives on a farm.

♥ You live on a farm.

♥ You know and love Massey Ferguson*

♥ You learnt to drive in a field or on a beach.

♥ You live in a cottage.

♥ Your home has a thatched roof.

♥ You saw the total eclipse in '99.

♥ Your local newspaper's lead story is 'cow falls off bridge'.

♥ You turned to drink, drugs or heavy metal at an early age.

♥ You know the best sledging to be had is at Haytor.

♥ Your friends say you sound like a farmer.

♥ You have nothing to do after 5:30pm.

♥ You think pink wellies are a fashion statement.

♥ You know 'Cornish' pasties are actually from Devon.

♥ You've boiled / frozen / eroded during Ten Tors.

♥ You know how to walk over a cattle grid.

♥ You want to know who came up with 'take moor care'.

♥ You know all about 'letterboxing' (but wish you didn't).

♥ You watch 'Spotlight' (and knew Teresa Driscoll, Justin Leigh, Russel Labey, Craig Rich and the gang).

♥ You've been pony trekking.

♥ 'Short and choppy on the North coast' makes total sense to you.

♥ You think nothing of grass growing in the middle of the road.

♥ Your town is 'the gem of south Devon' or 'the English Riviera' despite overwhelming evidence to the contrary*

♥ You think a barn dance is a wild night out.

♥ Until you went on holiday, the tallest building you had ever seen was Debenhams in Exeter.

♥ You've reversed for 3 miles when you met a stubborn tourist on a country lane*

♥ It takes you 4 times longer to drive anywhere between May and September*

♥ You carry an umbrella everywhere even when it's 35 degrees (because it WILL start to hail randomly)*

♥ You're a closet fan of The Wurzels.

♥ Your second cousin is also your sister's stepmother.

♥ Your neighbours' average age is 76*

♥ Your best friend goes joyriding in tractors*

♥ Your parents regularly thanked God for Crealy Country Park and Woodlands*

♥ Your teachers regularly thanked God for Paignton Zoo, Buckfast Abbey, Morwellham Quay and the legendary House of Marbles*

♥ You can't stand the grockles, despite living off their money*

♥ You thought it was normal for more than 50% of your high street's shops to be operated by charities*

♥ Everyone you meet has been on holiday to your home town - no wonder it's so busy in summer*

♥ You spent your entire childhood wanting to leave the place, yet now that you have, you cry yourself to sleep then dream of rolling green hills and long, sandy beaches*

♥ You used to read through your physical geography textbook because you knew half of the places in there.

♥ You know that 'the Launa man can'*

♥ Your most thrilling childhood experience was the Death slide at Woodlands / Crealy / The Devon Shire Horse Centre*

♥ Before Freeview, you didn't believe the rumours about a '5th television channel'*

♥ You don't yet have Freeview - what 5th channel?

♥ You found out about Plymouth Hoe / Westward Ho! before you realised the name could be entertaining*

♥ Your local shop sells clotted cream fudge and bucket/spade packs, but not newspapers.

♥ Your local publican (who has sideburns and red face) is a member of CAMRA, and thinks a 'gastropub' is a medical complication (he serves peanuts & crisps).

♥ You don't understand why a cinema would need more than two screens*

♥ Someone once ran past you clutching a burning barrel of tar*

♥ Your birthday was read out by a rabbit called Honeybun, Gus Honeybun*

♥ You use the 'fast and close' method for passing cars on country lanes - passing places are for grockles!*

♥ You can tell animals apart by their crap*

♥ You have had to walk home with only one welly on, after the other one was sucked into a bog / thick mud*

♥ You thought Hot Fuzz was a documentary*

♥ You think that running into the sea on New Year's or Christmas Day is brave, not foolish*

♥ You always thought of Gandy Street as a rich and varied shopping experience*

♥ Your car is considered a Site of Special Scientific Interest due to its unique collection of sand, mud, twigs and general wildlife from various Devonshire walks*

♥ You recognise a fellow Devonian across a crowded room when you hear the phrase "where you to"*

♥ You know that palm trees are from Torquay, not the Carribean*

♥ You know that a BMW X5 / Porsche Cayenne / Hummer H3 wouldn't get past a big puddle - proper farmers drive Landrovers!*

♥ As a kid, your Mum was always complaining about the grass stains on your trousers, thanks to you sliding down hills for fun on a sledge / compost bag / your arse*

♥ After a wet walk in the fields you return home 2 inches higher because of the Devon mud on your boots

♥ You understand that 'alright my handsome' is an entirely heterosexual greeting between men*

♥ Your drive to work involves following a quad bike, a herd of cows and a border collie*

♥ Your drive to work is on a quad bike, pursuing a herd of cows with a border collie running alongside*

♥ The tarmac playground at your school was only used when the school fields were muddy*

♥ You struggle to sleep at night because of the overwhelming silence, then get woken up by the dawn chorus, which is just plain irritating at 4:30am*

♥ You've been scared to death by stories like the Hairy Hands*

♥ You go home when it gets proper dimpsey*